Evolutionary Game Theory perspective: (def) DistancTrustn (=Degree of Trust) is a Fetishization of personal interaction that comes from Trust Escrow Systems. When we meet an unknown person (but one from a shared cultural TES), then we rely on the TES and we trust it, instead of the person themselves. However through sharing and caring, i.e. the exchange of Favors, and the human instinct of mirroring there develops (=fetishizes) a form of bond/trust (and people who feel such bonds are evolutionarily advantaged (source). Examples of D&E in action:

  • Your communication doesn’t break down because you assume the Cooperative Principle
  • You eat food grown, cooked and served by a stranger
  • You lend the bank your money, and expect them to return it to you in the future
  • You live in big apartments with hundreds of total strangers

Trust in Sociability

  • Relationship Bank Account

  • Asking & Giving Advice

  • Concentric Circles

    1. (Chosen) Family / Close Friends / Partnerships
      • Expectation: Listening & telling me important life situations/emotions. Being fully vulnerable.
      • Vulnerability.
        • Important in moving a casual friend to a close friend.
        • Emotionally nurtures you. When the other person returns it, it nurishes you.
        • Deposit & withdrawal in a Relationship Bank Account
    2. Friends / Family / Relatives
      • Favors are important. Don’t hesitate to give and receive favors.
    3. Acquaintances / Business Relationships
      • Manners are to everybody. Stagecraft works for everybody that interacts with you.
  • Similar levels of people can be used for similar roles in your life. Multidependence.

  • Where to Draw Lines. Personal Priority

    • You’re not responsible for other people’s emotions, unless they cross the “inner circle.“Even then, you shouldn’t work on fixing other’s emotions directly.
      • You’re also not responsible for other people’s emotions.
    • Respecting Opinions is unnecessary for those below a certain level of expertise in the topic (but don’t show your disrespect).
    • You need not allow any invasion of privacy of any emotional topics. What you share is completely your prerogative.
    • Events. Go to events that…
      • I have no personal priorities not to attend AND…
      • Are clearly beneficial to a relationship OR social organization inclusion
  • Q. Being Nice vs Being Stupid

  • A. It depends. On…

  • Saying what you want

Trust Within Organizations

In Social Organizations, all the above apply, including

  • I am not responsible for the organization’s well-being
  • Being Nice vs. Being stupid depends